Wednesday, June 28, 2017

You are weird to?

Woke up early again. Right toe, right elbow and left heel barking. So I get up, do my rounds and think I will shoot over to the Golden Arches and grab some coffee and Sausage McMuffins. I hate to admit it, but a spicy orange sausage like patty with Nuclear orange cheese-ish is a weakness of mine. ( Slogan- It's so good you can taste the orange). but I decided to not spend money I don't have.
So I dig through the frig and see a bowl of hamburger and pork and beans. Perfect. Heat it up in the microwave (cause I believe we have to free the radicals) and take my first steaming bite and DAMMIT it's chili. I like chili but when you are expecting sweet and you get not sweet it's a shock to the system.
It made me go back to some of those surreal moments in life....like when I had my first surgery, a hernia that ended up being a tumor in my groin. The lady asked me if I had cleaned up the area, and I had not because I had not been told to do so. So she starts clearing the forest, and I feel this breeze. She was blowing the strays out of the area......did I mention my wife was setting on the side of the bed. This nurse was blowing hair away like a carpenter would blow sawdust off his guide lines. I am just staring at the ceiling thinking 'did that just happen?' Which is what I asked my wife and she was like " That is NOT ok"......and then I sang eye of the tiger all the way to the operating room. I woke up screaming in post op.
And these are the kind of memories I have when I want Orange sausage and cheese, settle for beans and hamburger and get chili, unexpectedly.
Yeah, you are weird to.

Sunday, June 25, 2017

second thought


Consultation

That's right. I am moving into the lucrative 'consulting' field. Being new to the business, I am hedging my odds and focusing on 'miscellaneous'. I looked at the numbers, saw an opening, and took it.

 Still working on a slogan.


Mark Burkenbine ,  your choice when needing consultation.
"If you lose your keys, I'm your guy"

I'm pretty good at finding keys.

You don't want to have to do this again.

 Most people are going to be pissed when they find out that ALL of my blog and social media posts are going to be required reading/understan...