Perfectly acceptable bowel evacuating situations

It was 20 degrees and windy.  I'd spent all day on ice covered roads and It was getting dark. My assignment was to do a job nobody wants to do, and nobody wants to talk to you while you are doing it.  I had to park on a two lane highway with no shoulder, then slide down the drive on foot to get to the door. As I carefully  approached the door, I raised my arm to knock. Just as my arm is about to hit the door , my eyes sent the message to the brain to stop that hand from knocking on that door -even if it dislocates something. The note on the door was faded , and I assumed it said 'no soliciting' or ' day sleeper'.  I was very wrong.    I panicked,, looked around, and made my climb towards the car.

I did not get bit that day. And while I now truly understood what a bowel evacuating experience is, I am happy to say that did not happen either.

Stories of the unmentionable job are fictional ...all companies ,people, addresses, and private information  that may appear similar are merely coincidence.