Get a Garage! (PG rating)

Let me open by saying that if I sold garages, I would be screaming from the TOP of my lungs that EVERYONE should have one.  A chicken in every pot, and a garage for everyone.  WHY? what was ever found in a garage?
Just everything.
#HP, #apple,Dell, #Google, #amazon, and #marcmaron .  ( I was told I have to hashtag more. )
When is the BIG GARAGE lobby forcing through this legislation?

I make a LOT of death jokes since I was told I have the aneurysm. Just my way of looking at it. I will live or I will not, may as well have some fun with it. There is very little that I personally can do.  Keep blood pressure down with medication, and hope they fix it before it ruptures.  At rupture, I am gone or may as well be....I also am the proud owner of not one, but 2 hernias and arthritis and psoriasis.

I know. We all have problems. We really do.

So ...I am 46.  I just filled out an application for disability. I don't know if I will get it. I certainly DO NOT want it. But I may NEED it.   It is not enough to live on, and I am not a fan of government programs.
But...I spent my life driving long distances, working in a bowling pro shop, my dad is a carpet layer, I spent several years inspecting bank owned vacant homes or verifying occupancy for banks...the common theme to these jobs is heavy lifting, low amounts of aerobic activity, high stress and low pay.

 These jobs are not exactly endorsed for my condition. The job I made the most money from barely exists anymore and was the most stressful. I am  supposed to keep stress low, don't drive as much , no heavy lifting...

So I looked around on the computer....what can I do in this situation?

I have to take care of my wife when she is having health issues, also.This isn't a 24/7 deal year round, but I have to be prepared. When she is doing ok, she is the most productive person I have ever seen. .

So , I guess I need to figure out a way to support my wife and family from the side of the bed.

Options...I can kinda write a little. I am kinda articulate. I have been told I am kinda funny. I can kinda sing.   I am kinda creative.

Well, after the surgeries, and the place we were living being sold, I have been very homeless. We are, for awhile , in a hotel instead of the car. and kinda finally have a place lined up. IF.

So....we kinda go about seeing if this adds up. I am a LOUSY quitter. I really am.  Meaning , I don't want to quit, even if I am LOUSY.  So, especially in this situation, getting better than 'kinda' has to happen.

Again, I am taking suggestions that will work in this situation. No matter what happens, I have to take care of my wife for as long as I can.

Hourly schedule has to be flexible. Just need a deadline and I can get it done...I have lots of time during a day for work I can turn in from a computer.

I know what most of you are thinking.
I am a guy. So Porn always comes to my mind, also. I wouldn't pay to see this naked, so I couldn't charge you. Call it internal quality control.
Truth is, I lost the genetic lottery, also. Just don't have the heavy equipment. Those guys probably need to have liability insurance on their manhood.  If you were servicing that you could throw your back out and file a workmans comp claim. ..Lock jaw...who knows what else.
Probably have to have a sign that says your 'crevice must be this size to ride.' (hello....echo...echo..)
Again, just to prevent liability claims.
So..porn is out. I would like to say it is because of my moral compass..

By the way, what is your porn name?  First pet, street you grew up on.  I took Blackie South 11th, because I just couldn't use Ruffie Rural Route 1.

Job suggestions.....

So basically, I am messing around on the internet trying to figure out how NOT to be on government assistance for the rest of my possible short life, and support my wife, from the side of the bed.

Twitter, Youtube, Google+, Blogger, Facebook and Youtube.
Blogs are www.allthingsburkenbine.com   www.authoruntimely.blogspot.com  www.whatwouldthisbewithoutasong.blogspot.com 

If you enjoy any of my activities online, please tip at mbbowl@hotmail.com on Paypal. This is pay as you can entertainment so far.  & so far, I have got one tip for $1. After processing fees, I think it came to .63 cents.  Does that mean I lose my amateur status?  You be the judge.

If you do not appreciate my sense of humor, writing, singing or just kind of hate me...send money to a local charity instead. I would suggest that those Good Samaritan hotels at hospitals that survive on donations would be a good place to start.

  I have a short album ish on youtube called Change A Life 4 Better. (an attempt at singing) I am trying everything I always wanted to do.  What do I have to lose? I am pretty sure this is how you are supposed to live life in the first place.

Hope you enjoy your day and thank you for your time. This should probably be some kind of reality show.

Mark Burkenbine