Self Esteem Specialist

You know how , when you and your friends are setting around the bar feeling bad for yourselves, and that one loser comes in and makes you all feel better about yourselves...I have never seen that guy so it must be me.

I think that makes me a Self Esteem Motivational Specialist.      I just stand next to you and you feel good- but not for too long though.  

That would be creepy.    

It's my way of helping others.
----Mark Burkenbine.